Sleight of hand and twist of fate

The end was nearly there just now... i nearly died. was just hanging off the window just now..till i realised what i was doin. what was i even thinkin. what am i now.. i don't know. i don't know anything anymore. Gone.. the past me. it died when i started all those compromises with myself. i sold my soul.. now im payin that debt. my friend told me that at times like these. faith can heal you. it can bring you back... but i dont even have the courage nor time to seek out a religion. im just soo tired... all that positive bullshit i used to motivate myself in the pass doesnt even work anymore. still alive..barely.